I was driving to work one morning and listening to a radio station when a woman came on talking about kissing. She said that the majority of couples stop the long passionate kissing they shared when they first met and started dating. Well, I thought – after 20 some years of being together with my husband, I don’t really have the time to get in a deep sloppy passionate kiss every day. But it did make me think at how automatic and impersonal kissing has become in long-standing relationships. How many of us do the “quick hello/goodbye pecks”? Guilty!!
I am going to try this out. I know how my husband is going to react. First, he’ll do that loud, long, drawn out “WHAAAAAT??” and then I know right where his mind will go – you know where ….he’ll think he’s hit the jackpot of getting some everyday for a week straight. Ten seconds doesn’t sound long, but it can feel long when you are focusing on it. I just kissed the back of my hand for 10 seconds (no not a passionate kiss) – and it did seem kinda long.
I remember reading an article once about a woman who thought she’d bring back passion into her marriage by having sex every day for 30 days – no matter what. It didn’t matter how tired or busy they were, she wanted to follow through with her pledge to have sex for 30 days. At first, her husband was ecstatic (well, duh!!) and then by the third week, things changed. Her and her husband started fighting about “doing it” and meeting the 30 day quota. She was the one who pressed him and he was getting irritated that the experiment made the passion diminish and that it became a chore to fit the sex in daily. They found themselves doing it, just to knock off another day. So the outcome of her experiment was “Trying to force passion doesn’t always work”.
So the challenge here is for all of us to kiss our significant other for 10 seconds a day for one week. I’d would say 30 days, but let’s start with a week and see how that goes. Bonus for all of us if it becomes a daily passionate ritual.
Let me hear how it goes. I am particularly curious on how our partners react.
Shari – I want it all!
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I did it. I told my husband about the 10 second kiss for one week. He did do his long drawn out “Whaaaat” as I thought and then looked at me like I had 3 heads. I told him its for my blog and we have to start this off. He’s in. Here we go!
Day 1 of the 10 second passionate kiss challenge. Just as I suspected, my husband relates “passionate kiss” with sex. When I said we are starting the 10 second kiss today, his first words were “I’ll do it if you take your clothes off”. Well, I laughed and said come on we are going to do this. I told him to count in his head 10 seconds and we are not to break the kiss during that time. It was pretty funny talking about timing our kiss, we have been together over 20 years. We started giggling and said GO! Well…we hit 10 seconds, I got my way and then he got his! My analysis on day 1 – 10 second passionate kissing is a win, win situation for both of us.
What are you waiting for?
Shari – I want it all!
Day 2 of the 10 second passionate kiss challenge. Just about the first thing out of my husband’s mouth this morning was, “What are we doing now? A 10-second sex challenge?” Geez….
Day 3 of the 10 second passionate kiss challenge. We got up and did our normal get ready for work routine. Neither one of us thought of it. I remembered at night after dinner and brought it up that we still need to do “the kiss”. We did “the kiss”. Wasn’t like the first 2 days. It’s very easy to get caught up in our busy routines and forget about daily ‘passion’. Moving on to day 4!
Day 4 of the 10 second passionate kiss challage. It was past 10 o’clock at night and I was getting ready for bed. I went to the living room where my husband was watching TV and said, “We have to do the kiss”. Well, we kissed….please refer back to day 1 and 2!!!
This kissing is good stuff.
Day 5 of the 10 second passionate kiss challenge. My husband walked up to me in the kitchen and started giving me 10 quick kisses while counting. I was cooking dinner and said that didn’t count. He was also laughing while doing it. It’s better than not doing it at all, I was surprised he even remembered and took the initiated, so I’m happy with that.
Day 6 of the 10 second passionate kiss challenge. Completely forgot to do it. Friday evening, we had to go help out chaperoning a Varisty football pool party after a long day. We came home and both fell asleep watching TV.
Day 7 of the 10 second passionate kiss challenge. We made up for day 6. This challenge was exactly what I expected. Passionate kissing to my husband means sex. Passionate kissing to me means intimacy (and then sex). The difference is that I didn’t intend every kiss to turn into sex, I just wanted to kiss. My husband on the other hand, well you know….he’s a typical man.
I also learned that passionate blogging has the same results as the kiss test. Hope you all try it and write me about it.
Shari